It isn’t you. It isn’t anyone, really. I just find sometimes I’m standing here holding a million pieces of the sky in the palm of my hand. And I start thinking this is not what I imagined when I was five years old and didn’t know any better. But, the clock just keeps ticking and I just keep waiting for tomorrow to be different. Like some stroke of luck will plant me somewhere else entirely.
Pull me up by my roots, tun me inside out and upside down, anything but the sideways spin I keep falling into. Give me a reason to stay….anywhere. Make me believe it will be worth it in the end. I’m not one to hold my breath, hoping it will come full circle and we’ll still be holding hands when the curtains fall. I want to live outside these shadows, trust myself enough to let go and drift away. I don’t exist well on promises and faith. I need something more. Everything else has left me broken.
I’m not sure I’m strong enough to show you my weaknesses yet.